The prohibition of love
Women and men, or Yin and Yang, they have had a long, messy history together over the past millennia. From this time of yang dictatorship, we have probably all been able to learn a lot, and many continue to do so, because we are still in the middle of the yang-programmed system.
Taking that big step out of the old learned thought patterns into the new balanced yin age is not always easy. Much is new, and much is unfamiliar. The Yin wants to be discovered only completely anew after so long time of the stubborn rules.
Can we let go? And accept?
As a man, I don’t want to be presumptuous when I write about the new Yin, but perhaps my perspective will be valuable to some readers, as I have been working very hard on my own inner Yin-Yang balance over the past few years.
Can we really begin to live the new Yin? I often meet women in my life who would like to, but at the same time are still strongly rooted in the old yang structures, rules and prohibitions.
These structures, rules and prohibitions are then often used where there should actually be an opening: Instead of letting go and accepting (Yin), there is then the regular checking whether my intentions could also hopefully have no romantic desires.
As a man, I have to hide, hold back, and please don’t send a little heart in a text message, because it could be interpreted personally. Well, then it is. And?
Women want to be loved, men want to be loved. Why should a soul tell me that I am not allowed to love as long as no important closeness and distance contact boundaries are crossed?
In this way I have lost many a wonderful friendship. When I began to love, the friendship was usually dead for the woman.
It keeps triggering…
It happens in my waking dream world so that I can write about it. So that I can be honest with my feelings and share them with the world, wishing for nothing more than an opening of the Yin.
Rules are rules and agreements are always nice too, but do we really need to immediately and resolutely separate ourselves when confronted with love or even just potential love in our lives? At a time when we haven’t even been allowed to really get to know each other?
This love of the new age is perhaps unfamiliar, it often already comes with a fresh breeze of “unconditionality” and “everything is allowed to be”. I understand that this can be frightening. But do we have to run away from it?
Can we also welcome this new love?
Some dear souls in my life I can and may send hearts and kisses in personal messages if I feel that way at the moment. It’s okay because we have this open and trusting relationship with each other.
The loving is accepted. There is then no lack of trust and no fear that the Yang might go too far. It can just be accepted. That’s nice that it can be like that.
Then there are others where I have to watch like a lynx so that I don’t show too much heart and affection. But then I think to myself, why do I always have to be so careful because another soul doesn’t want to receive love, no matter how unconditional or non-physical it may come across.
As a man, I am often under general suspicion because my private parts produce hormones that create an automatic energetic attraction toward the yin pole.
Is that such a bad thing?
In my book Hooray, I’m Human! Sensual Energetic Healing (SEH) for Singles & Couples I have dedicated a whole chapter to falling in love: Is Falling in Love a Problem? (“Short answer: only if we let it become a problem.”).
I love each soul in a completely different way. With some I have a good friendly basis, with many there is a form of love.
With some connections, the rules of contact seem stringent to me, that is, logically coherent. But the Yin would like to be allowed to be also open and intuitive, accepting, and not rejecting.
What is the Yin missing besides security?
Just as a man is hormonally pulled in the direction of Yin (otherwise you, dear reader, would not be reading this text here…), a woman is hormonally pulled in the direction of structure and security by Yang.
This is biologically conclusively explainable, nature or Gaia’s blueprint has seen to that. It is only the humans of all conscious animal species who declare the hormonal differences between man and woman to be a problem and punish each other for it again and again.
Don’t we want to stop the bickering and enter the new yin age?
Don’t we both want something, and can’t we both give it to each other together? We can gladly discuss the rules and agreements repeatedly, especially if an unwanted boundary has been crossed and this has led to an inner displeasure or a bad feeling.
Isn’t love the consequence of accepting, letting go and connecting with each other? What kind and form we want to give this love our space and where we set our boundaries with each other, we can best find out if we allow ourselves to speak lovingly and honestly about our feelings. This, too, is a high art of Yin, which we may now get to know anew.