Do you like to be called cute?
In Spain, people often say mi niño or mi niña: my boy/girl. They also like to say it to people they don’t know, for example when shopping. It’s a form of expressing cuteness, meant as a compliment, a fond reminder of how young we are.
People strive to be young and feel young (into old age), it’s in their nature and it’s actually a good thing, it keeps us young longer! We always become the way we feel.
So this compliment contains an unconscious inner healing effect, if we can engage with it and not get angry instead because we don’t want to tolerate belittlement.
In Germany, people are sometimes very critical with the choice of language, sometimes for the good (there is less linguistic machismo than in Spanish) and sometimes it turns into blasphemy and creates problems where there should not be any, because instead the mindset or the point of view could be changed.
If the belittlement is communicated for lower motives of ego and does not come from the heart, then a compliment becomes a weapon or an insult. The same words may come across as pleasant and flirty to one person, and be interpreted as condescension or innuendo to another. It depends on the situation and whether or not we find the other person sympathetic. Perhaps it also depends on whether we want to open up to the other person, and whether that is also appropriate and okay, or not.
Many women don’t want to be cute, some don’t feel taken seriously then, and some prefer to be tough and strong (masculine) instead, because they have learned that this would be “better” in this world. The now fading millennia-long yang dictatorship has left deep marks, especially on women.
Some people also do not like to be called cute because they cannot love and accept themselves as the other person does. Then the words put us in an uncomfortable situation. It brings up inner conflicts, it can even spark anger, which then manifests itself in constant annoyance over little everyday things, not so uncommon in many relationships!
Why don’t we just accept and love each other for being human? One is like this… and the other is different. That’s okay, every soul thinks and feels differently. That makes us all kind of cute, doesn’t it 😉.